Home

Tonight as I ran errands I passed through a bunch of fresh trees they're selling for Christmas. The smell hit me, it made me think of Washington. That got me started pondering where "home" really is to me now.

For those who don't know, I was born in California and lived there for almost twelve years, then in Washington for fifteen years before moving to Utah four years ago.

The smell of those trees brought back memories of our house in Washington. We lived on an acre of land in the mountains and had plenty of pine trees around. I remember when we first moved there, it smelled to me like we were camping every day. The only time I'd been around that many trees was when we drove hours from Southern CA to the mountains to camp. Washington is where daughter was born, where I got started in my accounting career and where I have many good friends and fond memories. While I lived in Washington for fifteen years, and have many good memories there, it isn't home to me anymore.

Four years ago when I moved to Utah it was because of the situation I was in, not because I wanted to live in Utah. Utah was in fact the LAST place I'd ever wanted to live. When I moved here I was scared of being judged for being a single mom by all the "Utah Mormons". Actually, my experience has been the opposite. People are so willing to help me out, because I'm a single mom. Funny though, it feels like home now. Last weekend Kaylee spent the night with my parents and after picking her up I did errands in that area and it struck me, this feels like home. I remember when I first moved here I thought Utah was so ugly! It was so brown and... well brown. Now when I look at the mountains I think they're beautiful. I love that I see the sunshine on a very regular basis and never have time to lose my sunglasses! Sure beats the record 90-something days of no sunshine in WA.

This is where I've made my first home of my own. My townhouse may be old, but it's mine and I love it! Kaylee and I have a good life here, lots of friends and very friendly neighbors. I can't believe I'm saying this, but Utah really feels like home now. Although I gave my parents, and brother and sister, a really hard time for "ditching me" and moving to Utah, I'm glad they did. This is where I'm supposed to be now.

Sweetheart

When we got home from church on Sunday Kaylee realized she'd lost her "hearts" that she got in primary. She was quite upset and adamant that I couldn't make her new ones. I called around and found her teacher and she was sweet enough to bring Kaylee over a new set.

Kaylee got sick as soon as we got home from church on Sunday (she slept from 6pm until 9am - it was great!) so I gave her the hearts when she woke up on Monday morning. A little bit later she told me she was going upstairs to get a toy and I didn't think much of it... until she came downstairs and told me next time I go upstairs to look at my pillow.

Well anyone who knows me knows how much patience I don't have - so I went upstairs to see what she'd done. That sweet little girl of mine had made my bed and left a heart on my pillow!

Sick and with a temp of 102, the first thing she wanted to do that day was follow her primary teachers instructions to do something nice for someone. We were both sick and so my bed was a mess from us stealing the covers back and forth from each other. It was quite a feat to make the bed and she did such a good job!

I'm so thankful that she loves primary and has such a great teacher!

Go Jazz!

Tonight Kaylee and I went to the Jazz game. It was Kaylee's first Jazz game! She said it made her a little nervous, and that I was too loud, but that she had fun. They played Portland and it was an awesome game! I don't think I'll have much of a voice tomorrow. Of course, when the score is really close and there's 2 minutes left on the clock, Kaylee is adamant that she has to go potty NOW and can't hold it. I made her wait till the next time-out, then we ran to the bathroom. We literally ran all the way there, and all the way back. We made it back to our seats with 29 seconds left on the clock! Jazz won and we had a great time!


I bought 4 tickets, so we took my friend Sidreis and her son Colin (Kaylee's future husband, they're betrothed lol).

Kaylee LOVED the Jazz dancers and was really getting into it! She said when she grows up she wants to be a Jazz dancer :),

This is Kaylee in protest of all my yelling and screaming. At one point she said if I didn't stop she was going to leave. I told her fine, have fun finding the car! After that she didn't complain anymore.

She got tired of plugging her ears and this was her next attempt at blocking me out :)

Finally she gave up and got back into the game...

She's Home!!

After five long weeks at her Dad's house, Kaylee flew home all by herself today! Her dad and I were nervous wrecks, but she didn't understand what the big deal was. She says she flies all the time, so why would she be scared? I got to the airport way too early and had to sit around waiting for her flight to arrive. When the plane finally arrived and people started getting off, I stood by the gate with my camera. Because of the security rules now, everyone getting off the plane assumed I was waiting for a child to get off. A few people stopped and talked to me, asking how old Kaylee was and then telling me she did such a good job on the plane. I was glad to hear that, but mostly anxious to see her for myself! Here's the only shot I got of her coming off the plane, sorry it's fuzzy, I was nervous and shaking LOL!































That's the only picture I got, because after that she started running to me and yelling "Mommy! Mommy!" It was priceless! A few days ago when I was talking to her on the phone I asked her what she was going to do when she saw me. She responded "I'm going to run to you and give you tons of hugs and kisses because I miss you WAY more than you miss me Mommy!" I don't know who missed the other one more, but she did run to me and give me hugs and kisses :) Here's a picture of her and the flight attendant that took care of her during the flight:


























When we were waiting for her bags to be unloaded, Kaylee pointed to a lady in a wheelchair and told me that was the girl who'd sat next to her and talked to her. We went over and I introduced myself and thanked the lady for keeping her company on her first solo flight. Her name was June and she said Kaylee kept her entertained the whole flight and it was her pleasure. She said during the entire flight Kaylee kept saying how excited she was to see her Mommy, so she was glad to get to meet me. I'm so glad that Kaylee had such a good experience on her first flight alone! With us living in Utah and her Dad in Seattle, I'm sure this is the first of many flights for her on her own now.



As you know from my previous blog, I had a birthday surprise for Kaylee waiting for her at home. I set up a little treasure hunt for her when she got home, here's a video of it (sorry it's so dark, I didn't realize my house was so dark!):

Kaylee absolutely LOVED her surprise, and right away started doing both her makeup and mine. I know she's young for makeup, but she knows she can't wear it outside the house and that it's only for play. I reminded her the vanity is for homework when she starts school next year also. But for now I think she likes it the way it is!

Kaylee's Surprise

Kaylee was with her dad this year for her birthday, so I had a lot of time to come up with a gift for her. I had a hard time thinking of what to give her, but it finally hit me - the vanity I had growing up! My parents bought this vanity for me when I was 8. I used it for makeup, homework, everything. I quit using it years ago, but my mom saved it for me all these years so I could give it to my daughter.

I sanded it and repainted it, then sewed the skirt for it. It's hard to see in the pictures, but the fabric is pink with silver stars. I had no theme when I was shopping for the fabric, that all came later. My mom and I were just looking for fabric that would work in her room. After I found this fabric, the stars reminded me of a Primary song - I am Like a Star. I don't think they sing it much in Primary anymore, but we sang it a lot when I was growing up.

You can't really see in the picture, but I wrote "I am like a star shining brightly" on the wall around the mirror. I hope it serves as a reminder to her value as a daughter of God, and also of how beautiful she is.

She's coming home tomorrow and I have a treasure hunt all ready for her. There's clues and little surprises all over the house until she gets to the last one that leads her to her bedroom. I'm SO excited for her to come home and see it! She knows I've been working on a surprise for her birthday, but she has no idea what it is.

Here are the pictures:

Kaylee's Milestones

Recently, Kaylee has asked me at what age she hit different milestones. For instance, a few weeks ago Max (my nephew) got his first tooth and when I told Kaylee about it, she asked how old she was when she got her first tooth. Sadly, I had to tell her I didn't know, but I'd find out. That first year of her life was quite stressful, and I wasn't very good at documenting those things. Luckily, I took pictures of everything! So now all I have to do is find the picture, and look at the date to know when it happened.

I thought I'd dedicate my first blog to finally documenting those milestones.

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Kaylee Michelle Carr was born at 5:02am on October 1, 2003 (TEN days late I might add, and after 24 hours of labor and an emergency c-section, so that's my excuse for how I look!)

Kaylee was blessed on October 12, 2003. She was blessed in the same dress that my mom, myself, little sister Kim, and niece Abby were all blessed in.

Now, I'm not sure what the next milestone for an infant is, but for Kaylee it was going to Hawaii at two and a half weeks old (what was I thinking and how did I survive that??)

She put her toes in the sand and ocean for the first time on 10/23/03. She squeezed her toes tight and later we found a bunch of sand in her toes, I wish I would have saved it for her!

Kaylee went swimming for the first time on 10/25/03. It was so hard for me to sit on the side and watch her swim with her dad. So I said to heck with the rules, I'm taking my chances! I didn't go in the ocean, I figured of the two options, the pool probably had enough chlorine to kill anything that was bad.

Okay, that was fun. Now back to the real milestones....

I can't remember when she started sitting up, I know - how could I forget that? - but the first pictures I can find of her sitting are around the middle of March.

Kaylee got her first tooth on May 25, 2004. Sadly, I didn't even notice she had a tooth(I know, another how did I miss that moment!)! Kaylee used to go to work with me and it was actually a coworker of mine, Tilly, that noticed she had a tooth. This picture was taken as soon as we got home from work that day.

I can't remember when Kaylee first took her first steps, but I know she started walking right before her first birthday. I was usually home alone with her, so I guess I didn't get many pictures of those first steps. Here's the first picture I can find of her walking (it's at her first birthday party, I dressed her up in the Huskies dress for her dad)

And now for the last milestone for tonight.... the first time she had candy! My dad tried to get her to eat an M&M when she was about 9 months old, but she spit it out. I didn't give her any sugar until after she was a year old. These pics are on Halloween 2004 at her Aunt Becci's house... I think she liked that sucker and didn't want Mommy to take it away!